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Psychos,
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Lunatic
THIS could change the history books as we know it. A giant Toblerone bar has been found buried underneath the Pyramids of Giza, new SAR technology has found.
Researchers from Switzerland discovered the huge subterranean honey, almond nougat, and salted caramel structure sprawling kilometres under Giza, which they now believe could contain the secrets of the ancients.
"How have these giant pyramid chunks of chocolate not melted in the extreme desert heat over thousands of years is anyone's guess," posed Dr. Fredrick Serison, lead researcher of the team responsible for the find.
Chocolate of The Gods author Graham Cockhang has welcomed the findings, which he says proves his theory of an ancient civilisation which was wiped out due to a sudden wave of obesity during the younger Dryas period over 12,000 years ago.
"Evidence of advanced chocolate loving civilisations just keeps getting older and older," Cockhang told WWN, whose theories have been labelled as ludicrous by mainstream archaeologists who continue to attack his work.
"Graham obviously has never studied the fact that chocolate has been around for tens of thousands of years and that this is nothing spectacular really," ancient Egypt archaeologist
Professor Clint Drool dismissed the find as nothing but ordinary.
It is believed that as well as the hidden range of Toblerone triangular columns, they also came across a 300-metre papyrus till receipt for 2,000,000 shat, which would be the equivalent of $4bn in today's money.
"Toblerone seems to have been always an expensive choice of chocolate, fitting of pharaoh kings," researchers concluded.
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📚 Weekly reading check-in! What’s everyone reading this week?! Since last week I finished Prince of Song & Sea and started/finished Beautifully Cruel. Now currently reading All The Missing Girls.
Prince of Song & Sea was SO good. A great The Little Mermaid retelling with lots of tie-ins to the Disney movie while still telling a completely unique and fun story. The secondary characters had some LGBTQ rep which was cool to see. Prince Eric is the best Prince. 5 star read for me. 🖤
Beautifully Cruel was another 5 star read for me. Perfect amount/type of spice and it actually had a point for the story and wasn’t thrown in just to be spicy. Liam Black is my new book boyfriend. Had a sweet happy ending that I loved. 🖤
All The Missing Girls is a thriller that’s told backwards. I don’t know what I think yet. I like it, but it’s not pulling me in or making me feel like I can’t put it down. But I think we’re getting to the good stuff soon so hopefully it picks up!
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